Post by Saint Saito on Oct 29, 2015 6:09:40 GMT
Wrestling is not Cheerleading
Word Count: 499/500
“All women are created equal…then a few become cheerleaders.”
- Unknown
The scene begins inside of a high school gymnasium. The room was large, brightly lit and was completely empty save for Saint Saito herself. The New Ace of Joshi Puroresu made her way to the centre of the gymnasium, dressed in a red and gold cheerleaders outfit and carrying a pair of red pom-poms.
“Ready?!” she began with a smile on her face as soon as she stopped walking and turned to face the camera, pom-poms in her hands. “Okay! Gimme a duuuhhh! Gimme a huuuuhhh! Gimme a yuuuuhhhh! Gimme a – screw it…”
And with that, Saito dropped her pom-poms to the floor and kick them away from her.
“Honestly, why do girls want to do this shit?” Saito wondered to herself aloud, before addressing the camera. “Anyway, I’m sure you can tell that I’m making fun of my other opponent in my handicap ma – sorry, my three-way match! – Cherry Oliver. Now Cherry hates me as much as that other little twit I’m set to face, enough to maybe forget that this is a three-way match, so clearly I’m at a disadvantage, right? Not to mention that in said match I agreed to certain…stipulations, so the disadvantage is greater still, but you know what?”
Saito smirked for the camera.
“Junko and Cherry can have all the advantages in the world over Saint Saito, but I still plan on taking those two bitches out and moving on to bigger and better things: namely being the first ever Champion of Seishin!”
A pause, and then…
“Now…I’ve already talked about one idiot in my match, so now I’ll talk about the other…”
The camera followed Saito as she took a seat on the nearest bench before addressing the camera again.
“Cherry Oliver is not a real wrestler, see. She only joined the business because her meathead jock boyfriend was the amateur kind, and she was deluded enough to think she could be the professional kind, like me. Silly little idiot couldn't even tell the difference! Like...duh, Cherry! Can't you even do that right? But, no matter what the style, wrestling ain’t like cheerleading, and Cherry can pretend that she’s like me all she wants, but the fact still remains that even my kid brother can kick her ass, let alone...you know, me."
“Honestly? Cherry was better off staying a cheerleader; that way she wouldn’t have to get her buck teeth knocked out with a well-placed knee right in the kisser at the next Seishin show! But...until then?”
Saito rose from the bench and retrieved her pom-poms from the floor. She took position and held them close to her chest as she was about to begin.
“Ready?! Okay!” she cheered with a smile on her face. “Two-Four-Six-Eight! Who do we appreciate?! Saito! Saito! Gooooo Saito!”
Saito then smirked at the camera and added, “Nailed it,” before she dropped her pom-poms to the floor again and walked away as the screen faded to black.
